If At Fist You Do Not Suceed, Try and Try Again....

I have tried everything to get my life in working order. I tried to replicate Martha Stewart, then I dabbled in the philosophies of the Flylady, and presently I keep inviting myself over to my neighbors house so I can see how she manages to keep her home so pristine. Nothing works!

Martha Stewart is perfection (I am not referring to her as a human just to her home making skills). Her home is straight out of Pottery Barn, the food she serves is delectable, professional and delicious her mannerisms fit to entertain the Queen (I am assuming all this for I have never met her personally, seen her house nor eaten her food but I read her magazines and this is how I imagine it). I tried to mimic her perfection. My home did look like Pottery Barn....Post-Katrina; my food was burnt and often lacked taste for I could not find/afford all the spices she uses; and I just can not make small talk with people I have no interest in. So I decided that she was not my role-model mommy and I moved on.....

The Flylady was my next stop. Flylady says NO! to prefect ion and after torturing myself with the Martha Mayhem perfection was not on my top ten list. The Flylady taught me routine. Of course, with the obsessive compulsive disorder I inherited from stalking Martha, the routines became a little.....okay a HUGE burden. Everything had to be planned. If something did not go according to plan there was hell to pay. I thank God my daughter is too young to remember this dark period of my life but by husband still shutters every time he hears an egg timer. Finally, he ended my romance with routines by burning my Control Binder.

So, that was two-role models down and I was to the point where I convinced myself that every home in America was really in total disarray. Until I met me neighbor. Her house is spotless (eat off the floor clean) perfectly decorated, she works, she mothers, she even entertains...other adults. Her children are well behaved, her husband is charming and her floors contain not even one cheerio. I HAD to find out how she did it. So I became friends with her...to get close and find out her secret. My first thought was Crystal Meth (I saw a special on dateline that it is very common for suburban mothers to take Meth so they can get through the day). I ruled that out... she has perfect teeth. So then I decided that it must be Aderal. Like on Desperate Housewives. I checked her medicine cabinet.....accidentally, and could find no such substance...plus I guess her 18 month old is a little young for ADHD. She must have sold her soul to the devil then. This I can not refute with hard evidence but I just do not think this is the answer.

Finally, I asked her how she did it. She said she just does a little bit everyday. She tries to pick up after herself and she incorporates little time-saving cleaning tips into her daily routines. So that is what I am going to do to. I am going to get rid of the idea that perfection exists. I am going to through out the stringent routines and rely on what has gotten me this far.....luck!